PITA BUNNY's blog: "LAUGH UR AZZ OFF!!!"

Dear Santa,
I've written you for three years now asking for
a fire truck. Please, I really really want a
fire truck this year!
Love, Joey

Dear Joey,
Let me make it up to you. Christmas Eve, while
you sleep, I'm gonna torch your house. You'll have
more fire trucks than you'll know what to do with.
- Santa

Dear Santa,
I don't know if you can do this, but for Christmas,
I'd like for my mommy and daddy to get back together.
Please see what you can do.
Love, Teddy

Dear Teddy,
What, and ruin that hot affair your dad's still
having with the babysitter? He's banging her like
a screen door in a hurricane, son! Let me get you
some nice Legos instead.
- Santa

Dear Santa,
I left milk and cookies for you under the tree, and
I left carrots for your reindeer outside the backdoor.
Love, Susan

Dear Susan,
Milk gives me the shits and carrots make the reindeer
fart in my face. You want to be a kiss-ass? Leave me a
bottle of Jaegermeister and a couple of Cohibas!
-Santa