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deadly angel's blog: "darkangel"

created on 12/08/2006  |  http://fubar.com/darkangel/b32530  |  3 followers


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love

love is a rare thing so when u find it hold on to it 

love comes in many forms  u can love a friend as a friend doesnt mean any more 

you love your parents as your parents 

you love your wife/gf like u have never loved anyone before and will love her like no one else 

you love your siblings cause u were taught to love family 

you love your children casue thats what parents do 

love comes in many forms 

not so happy

happiness is what u make of it somedays are better than others 

i may look happy on the outside but on the inside im dying 

of being broken so many times so many doubts about people and myself not sure 

were to turn or were to go the pain is still so real 

i eel like a lost kid looking for acceptence in life 

with out a family  lost and alone 

happy on the outside is she when deep down she is crying on the inside 

waiting for someone to love her for who she is not what she use to be 

pain

pain is all i ever felt in my life hurt is all i know tears is all i cry . smile i never knew how to laugh how to smile and or how to love i was never taught those things i was taught to never be happy never speak my mind never stand up for my self i was taught i said something wrong i got beat and thats all i have ever know is pain and hurt . when i was younger everything i did was wrong to my parents my sister and who i was with at the time i spoke something they didnt like i got yelled at or hit i went some were i shouldnt have gone i got yelled at or hit . it seemed like nothing i did was right in there eyes or in there minds i still feel like i have to watch what i do and what i say so i dont get hurt or yelled at again i hide in my shell like a turtle to protect myself from harm . harm from men harm from family and most of all harm from myself iam tired of having to shelid myself hope one day as i grow older i can take my guard down and not be so afraid and not be in so much pain just a little insite to why iam the way iam

 

 

 

 

some of my old writtings i found 

broken

the dark is everywere the light is no longer around my heart is cold my body is lifeless my heart aches for the light my body needs the warmth of the light all around me is cold and dark i live in darkness anymore no light no feelings no heart it is dead and cold need to find warmth and light to be whole again

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