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DarkAngel's blog: "Dark's Insite"

created on 11/01/2006  |  http://fubar.com/dark-s-insite/b20148

Linkin Park Live in Texas

I have this DVD. My 10 year old son and I listen to it everyday. "Lying From You" When I pretend everything is what I want it to be I look exactly like what you always wanted to see When I pretend, I can’t forget about the criminal I am Stealing second after second just cause I know I can but I can’t pretend this is the way it’ll stay I’m just (trying to bend the truth) I can’t pretend I’m who you want me to be, so I’m [Chorus] (Lying my way from you) No no turning back now (I wanna be pushed aside so let me go) No no turning back now (Let me take back my life,I’d rather be all alone) No turning back now (Anywhere on my own cuz I can see) No no turning back now (The very worst part of you is me) I remember what they taught to me Remember condescending talk of who I ought to be Remember listening to all of that and this again So I pretended up a person who was fittin’ in And now you think this person really is me and I’m (Trying to bend the truth) But the more I push the more I'm pulling away 'cuz I'm [Chorus] (Lying my way from you) No no turning back now (I wanna be pushed aside so let me go) No no turning back now (Let me take back my life I’d rather be all alone) No turning back now (Anywhere on my own cuz I can see) No no turning back now (The very worst part of you) (The very worst part of you is ME) This isn’t what I wanted to be, I never thought that what I said would have you running from me Like This This isn’t what I wanted to be, I never thought that what I said would have you running from me Like This This isn’t what I wanted to be, I never thought that what I said would have you running from me Like This This isn’t what I wanted to be, I never thought that what I said would have you running from me Like This [Chorus] (You) No turning back now (I wanna be pushed aside so let me go) No no turning back now (Let me take back my life I’d rather be all alone) No turning back now (Anywhere on my own cuz I can see) No no turning back now (The very worst part of you) (The very worst part of you is me)
There's something cold and blank behind her smile She's standing on an overpass In her miracle mile (coma): "Cause you were from a perfect world A world that threw me away today today today to run away" A pill to make you numb A pill to make you dumb A pill to make you anybody else But all the drugs in this world Won't save her from herself Her mouth was an empty cut And she was waiting to fall Just bleeding like a polaroid that Lost all her dolls (coma): "You were from a perfect world A world that threw me away today today today to run away" A pill to make you numb A pill to make you dumb A pill to make you anybody else But all the drugs in this world Won't save her from herself A pill to make you numb A pill to make you dumb A pill to make you anybody else But all the drugs in this world Won't save her from herself "You were from a perfect world A world that threw me away today" A pill to make you numb A pill to make you dumb A pill to make you anybody else But all the drugs in this world Won't save her from herself A pill to make you numb A pill to make you dumb A pill to make you anybody else But all the drugs in this world Won't save her from herself

The Darkness

If only it were so simple, to cruise through life smelling roses; but the obstacles blacken the countryside, and we unwittingly crush them beneath our boots. Dreams sustain us through the madness; goals give a finish line to our race. Yet they change with every turn, around every wall, and remain elusive throughout the quest. Mistakes are made, and regrets are our luggage; we will drag them with us to slow us down. The victories are flashes of light, sudden and unlasting, which allow us to glimpse the road ahead before darkness descends. Love is bitter, yet it is the bread that keeps us. Over and over it fills us up, only to starve us. The people whom we love shape our destinies and our strengths, yet leave us cold and alone in the darkness. There are others trying to race to the end; occasionally, we bump into one or two. The bonds we form help us down the path less lonely but eventually, we lose each other in the darkness. Alone is not a bad way to be; it clears your head and focuses you on the journey. Cherish the short intervals during the quest you have with others, but be prepared to walk alone in the darkness.

Depression

Depression exhausts me. Depression blinds me. Depression strangles me. A wild depression Has stolen away the hope Which he claimed as his only friend Here on earth. Alas who will now flash A rainbow of hope Across his heart Sunk deep? No more depression, No more frustration, No more hallucination. In me I see a new dawn- A dawn that will reveal Divinity's life fulfillment On earth.
I've been down enough to call it quits ...many of times Sometimes tripped Sometimess pushed Sometimes I stumbled At least once I collapsed But no time did I stay That's because something inside won't let me die I've been treated like a bridge for feet to walk over I've felt like a stump for the wicked to rest on I've been the one done wrong and the one with the wrong doing But no time did I stay Because something inside won't let me die I've had the gates of hell knocking While I stood on the Solid Rock All the while rocking Wondering where my troops were Finding out it's not in the seen Learning to trust in the invisible The unseen hand reaching down to grab for me letting me know I can Because I couldn't stay Something inside won't let me die I've forsaken myself enough times to count on at least one hand The weaker side of me joining the side of the enemy to take me out Had plans to end it Wishing it to be over But the written was different What was...is....what shall be So I couldn't stay Because something inside won't let me die Greater is He in me than he that is in the world That means the battle is already won It's won when I'm bent over It's won when the tears fall down It's won when the heart is broken It's won when I wish the days would cease It's won Because I can't stay down that way When something inside won't let me die

Her eyes

Her eyes are looking at me. As I look back, I see the pain. The feeling of despair is so evident, but no one else seems to notice. I can see her anguish, her suffering it is almost too much to bear. She is trapped in a world in which no one understands. She is fighting to survive; each day is harder than the day before. Why doesn't anyone else see this? I want to help her, but I feel restricted by some unknown force. Her pain is so overwhelming. I'm still looking into her eyes, I can't turn from them. They are so foreign yet so for familiar! I can feel her anguish, the pain takes hold and will not release me it pulls me into this empty void. This terrible reality which is her world! A world she cannot relinquish herself from. Finally, I am able to blink my eyes, and she is still looking back at me in the mirror.

You Said it was "My" fault

You said it was my fault. You said I deserved it. You said I needed seeing to. You said it would be fun. You said it was my fault. You told me that I was evil. You said I was a whore. You called me every name under the sun. And said it was my fault. You said I was asking for it. 'all bitches get what they deserve' Thats what you said. You said no one would believe me. You said people would blame me. You told me it was all my fault. You said I was evil. You said I was vile. You said i was a lot of things. I believe you were describing yourself. Your the evil one. Your an evil Bitch
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