So, last night my friends took me out for my bday. I'm thinking out to eat and then to a club of some sort. Yeah, we hit a club alright. A flippin' strip club. Then they proceeded to tell the dude there that it was my bday and next thing I know, I'm up on stage TIED to a frigging chair and all of the strippers proceeded to rub their tits and crotches on my face and every other available body part I have. Let's not forget for the finale, they untied me, made me get down on my hands and knees and proceed to SPANK me with a fucking belt.
Suffice to say, I woke up this morning smelling like liquor, baby oil and snatch.
Fun times.