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funkymonkey's blog: "My thoughts"

created on 05/04/2008  |  http://fubar.com/my-thoughts/b212984

DAD

I really am not much of a blogger and please don't spell check me but I had some thought that i needed to get out. I am writing this on the7th anniversary of my fathers death. Today is a very hard day for me because when I was younger my father and I were not very close. In fact my gradfather was more like a father to me at times than my dad was. I understand that my dad had to work to keep us fed but he was hardly home with driving truck and stuff.As I got older and things slowed down and eased up for my dad we became much closer and became very good friends plus father and son. I could finally talk to my dad about things that I was once afraid to mention to him. It felt real nice to have a friend, buddy, and father all in one. I also realize that I had my father in my life than a lot of other people, but concidering that I didn't really have my of a relationship with him until i was in my mid to lat 20's I didn't have that relationship long. Unfortunately My dad passed away when I was almost 37. As I sit here today reflecting on the things that have gone past and the things still to come it makes me realize how much I miss him and still need him to be around. Oh I know that he was proud of the things that I had done even tho he never said it to me, but I heard from other the thing he would say to them and that made me feel good to know that he was proud. My dad became il and spent a month in the hospitol before he died and was not coheirent enough to know what was going on around him so I never really got a chance to tell him that I knew he was proud of me evern tho he didn't tell me and I never got the chance to tell him that I understood why he did some of the things he did and that I was proud to be his son. I also never got a chance to tell him that I loved him. I guess my point to this is don't ever take anything for granted because you never know how long it will last. Also you never know what you have until it is gone. so try to live every day to the fullest and never take things for granted and be sure to tell the ones that you love, that you love and care for them because this time could be the last time you get to say it, because their is not a day that goes by that i don't miss my dad and even times that I pick up the phone to call him and realize that I can't. So please make sure that you have no regrets when that day comes for you. One last thing then I am done. Daddy I love you and miss you
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