A lot of people are meeting over the internet now, with the chat rooms. I really hate the chat rooms, cuz I think the only thing worse than getting rejected is getting rejected by someone who’s NEVER MET YOU. Ooh, hi, sex kitten. BOOP - ignore, dammit! And it’s scary, you never know who you’re talking to online. I was chatting with a girl, she says - “I’m kind of a bigger girl.” That’s cool, how big? “I’m not gonna tell you.” Come on, tell me, just ball park estimate. “Ball park? YANKEE STADIUM!”
And a lot of people love the cybersex, with the dirty talk. I have to say, I’m still kinda torn on this concept, because I love sex, but I really hate bad spelling and grammar, and a lot of people suck at typing. Granted, it’s tough to type with one hand, but come on. Hard to keep the candle lit when you’re correcting more bad spelling than a 3rd grade remedial English teacher in Arkansas. Really, I hate typos, nothing’s going to kill the mood for me faster than a woman telling me she wants to ‘stock my deck.’ You want me to put my clock where? Why do you wanna stroke my pens and lick my walls? Why do you want me to trust in your posse? Did she just say she wants to swallow my gum? And here’s something I’ve wondered - if you get into a fight with your loved one on the internet, do you get to have angry make-up cybersex later? What would that be like? Would you just keep hitting the pound key - Ooh, you like that - pound, pound, pound.
