I am so confused by everything in my life right now everything seems to be going so well and I am rather happy. But there is still something inside me that makes me feel like there is a storm brewing. The past four months have been a complete rollercoaster and I've wanted to stop the ride and prayed that it was over and now that things are on an easier ride there is something inside me that seems to be on another ride. I can feel that something is getting ready to happen and I'm scared that it will end me back on the scary rollercoaster that I cannot make stop a storm that will be worse than the last. I'm not sure what's going on with me I want to laugh and be happy and try to be a better person than I have been in the past but there is something inside me that tells me things aren't going to get better and this happiness won't last long and I'm not sure what I can or will do. When will all this confusion die down so I can finally live and not worry abot the next bad thing that is going to happen? I know life is full of ups and downs and goods and bads but the bads take me to a place so dark and deep that I can barely pull myslef out of. I know lifes not perfect nor will ever be I'd just like a little more happiness and less confusion and darkness.
