It'll be days till somebody notices I'm gone
and no one will hear me screaming
i'm terrified-we're all alone
you reach out to touch me and i see your eyes gleaming
i'll pull away, i'll resent myself for playing the fool
you'll stroke my hair and call me a tease
i'll kick myself for being so stupid
i knew this all along, i'm an object meant to please
i'm regretting ever letting you know me
promising to fulfill my hopes, and my fears
you're coming closer, i'm backing away
hoping you don't see my shaking hands and threatening tears
you look into my eyes and ask me 'what's wrong'?
and my glares just seem to amuse you
with the way your scolding and chastising me
you'd think i've been planning this simply to confuse you
you'll tell me i'm pretty-i'll hate you for it
i might even start to cry
you'll laugh and say 'you believed me before'
and other things i wish i could deny
an urge to die will come over me
pathetic, begging please don't
i'll whisper 'not now' and promise not to tell
and you know i'll be so ashamed that i won't
i'll gasp for air, shut my eyes tight
focus on resisting
but when i see a smile creeping up your face
i'll realize its you i'm assisting
as i'll pull back my hair
i know i'll hate myself for giving in
sit quietly, go numb
it's easier to let you win
we'll go in circles, hating each other deeply
your wandering thoughts, and my blank stare
you tell me it'll be fine and all over soon
if i just tell you that i'll always care
i'll realize i have no choice
let myself sink into your lies for now and give up the fight
intent on getting through the next hour
i'm accustomed to this, i get through it alright
you'll kiss my cheek, tell me you love me
and i won't bother to utter a feeble reply
i won't look up, and you'll mutter 'don't tell'
i'll nod in understanding of our goodbye
