> COMPUTER HELP DESK
>
> This has got to be one of the funniest I've heard of in a long
>time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a
true story from the WordPerfect Helpline which was transcribed from a
> recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to
>say, the Help Desk employee was fired however, he is currently suing the
> WordPerfect organization for "Termination without cause." This is
>the actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee
>(now I know why they record these conversations)
>
> Employee_.r{}--"Rich Hall computer assistance; may I help you?".r{}**/--".r{}**--"What sort of trouble?"*
>
> Customer_.r{}*--"*Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden
>the
> words went away."
>
> Employee_.r{}*--*"*Went away?"*
>
> Customer_.r{}*--"*They disappeared."
>
> Employee_.r{}*--"Hmmm. So what does your screen look like now?"*
>
> Customer_.r{}*--"*Nothing."
>
> Employee_.r{}*--"Nothing?"*
>
> Customer_.r{}*--"*It's a blank; it won' t accept anything when I
>type."
>
> Employee_.r{}*--"Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"*
>
> Customer_.r{}*--"*How do I tell?"
>
> Employee_.r{}*--"Can you see the 'C:' prompt on the screen?"*
>
> Customer_.r{}*--"*What is a sea prompt?"
>
> Employee_.r{}*--"Never mind, can you move your cursor around the
>screen?*"
>
> Customer_.r{}*--"*There isn't any cursor; I told you, it won't
>accept
> anything I type."
>
> Employee_.r{}*--"Does your monitor have a power indicator?"*
>
> Customer_.r{}*--"*What's a monitor?"
>
> Employee_.r{}*--"It's the thing with the screen on it that looks
>like a
> TV. Does it have little light that tells you when it's on?"*
>
> Customer_.r{}*--"*I don't know."
>
> Employee_.r{}*--"Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find
>where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"*
>
> Customer_.r{}*--"*Yes, I think so."
>
> Employee_.r{}*--"Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if
>it's
> plugged into the wall."*
>
> Customer_.r{}*--"*Yes, it is."
>
> Employee_.r{}*--"When you were behind the monitor, did you notice
>that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"*
>
> Customer_.r{}*--"*No."
>
> Employee_.r{}*--"Well, there are. I need you to look back there
>again and find the other cable."*
>
> Customer_.r{}*--"*Okay, here it is."
>
> Employee_.r{}*--"Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged
>securely
> into the back of your computer.*"
>
> Customer_.r{}*--"*I can't reach."
>
> Employee_.r{}*--"Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"*
>
> Customer_.r{}*--"*No."
>
> Employee_.r{}*--"Even if you maybe put your knee on something and
>lean way over?"*
>
> Customer_.r{}*--"*Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle
>it's
> because it's dark."
>
> Employee_.r{}*--"Dark?"*
>
> Customer_.r{}*--"*Yes - the office light is off, and the only light
>I have
> is coming in from the window."
>
> Employee_.r{}*--"Well, turn on the office light then."*
>
> Customer_.r{}*--"*I can't."
>
> Employee_.r{}*--"*No? Why not?"
>
> Customer_.r{}*--"*Because there's a power failure."
>
> Employee_.r{}*--"A power.......a power failure?.... Aha, Okay, we've
>got
> it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing
>stuff your computer came in?"*
>
> Customer_.r{}*--"*Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
>
> Employee_.r{}*--"Good.. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack
>it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you
>bought it from."*
>
> Customer_.r{}*--"*Really? Is it that bad?"
>
> Employee_.r{}*--"Yes, I'm afraid it is."*
>
> Customer_.r{}*--"*Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell
>them?"
>
> Employee_.r{}*--"Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer."*
