> this one is funny!!
>
> Then one morning, I was taking my shower after breakfast when I
> heard my wife, Deb, call out to me from the kitchen.
>
> Honey! The garbage disposal is dead again. Please come reset it."
> "You know where the button is," I protested through the shower
> pitter-patter and steam. "Reset it yourself!"
>
> But I'm scared!" she persisted. "What if it starts going and sucks
> me in?" There was a meaningful pause and then, "C'mon, it'll only
> take you a second."
>
> So out I came, dripping wet and buck naked, hoping that my silent
> outraged nudity would make a statement about how I perceived her
> behavior as extremely cowardly. Sighing loudly, I squatted down
> and stuck my head under sink to find the button. It is the last
> action I remember performing.
>
> It struck without warning, and without any respect to my
> circumstances. No, it wasn't the hexed disposal, drawing me into
> its gnashing metal teeth. It was our new kitty, who discovered
> the fascinating dangling objects she spied hanging between my legs.
>
> She had been poised around the corner and stalked me as I reached
> under the sink. And, at the precise moment when I was most
> vulnerable, she leapt at the toys I unwittingly offered and snagged
> them with her needle-like claws. I lost all rational thought to control
> orderly bodily movements, blindly rising at a violent rate of speed,
> with the full weight of kitten hanging from my masculine region.
>
> Wild animals are sometimes faced with a "fight or flight" syndrome.
> Men, in this predicament, choose only the "flight" option.
> I know this from experience. I was fleeing straight up into the
> air when the sink and cabinet bluntly and forcefully impeded my
> ascent . The impact knocked me out cold.
>
> When I awoke, my wife and the paramedics stood over me. Now
> there are not many things in this life worse than finding oneself
> lying on the kitchen floor buck naked in front of a group of
> "been-there, done-that" paramedics.
>
> Even worse, having been fully briefed by my wife, the paramedics
> were all snorting loudly as they tried to conduct their work, all the
> while trying to suppress their hysterical laughter... and not
> succeeding.
>
> Somehow I lived through it all.
>
> A few days later I finally made it back in to the office, where
> colleagues tried to coax an explanation out of me about my
> head injury. I kept silent, claiming it was too painful to talk
> about, which it was.
>
> "What's the matter?" They all asked, "Cat got your tongue?"
>
> If they only knew!
