Okay so here is the deal, I am sick and tired of every idiot who watched the news six months ago wanting to discuss the war on terror, or the war in Iraq or whatever international issue without knowing what the heck they are talking about. You want to play with me, you have to bring your A game. This is big dog stuff, all little dogs need to stay on the porch.
If your argument can be reduced to a sound bite, you are most likely wrong. If you have to be told by the television or the media what to think, you are not at my level. And I don’t care if you are liberal or conservative I don’t want to hear your BS argument. Here is what you need to do, look at both sides of the argument before coming to talk to me. Your one quarter in a poly sci class does not make you an expert in anything, and even though you were the captain of your high school debate team does not put you at the level of people who really know the topic.
This is also where I should address information versus education. Education is important; it is the silver bullet to a number of the problem in our country. With a better education system our children will fix a number of the problems with our country. Better education will have a domino effect.
However a higher education does not mean you know everything about everything. And if my recent experiences have taught me anything, education can sometimes mean you don’t know shit about anything.
I make no secret of the fact that I am in the military, a number of my friends and most of my current co-workers are former military and I am from a very liberal area and my parents happily voted for Andersen in the 80s. How many conversations do you think I have had about war, or the government? And do you really think that you can make a point that I haven’t heard before?
My first big anti-government conversation in the military was straight out of AIT. I was home on leave after Airborne school, I hadn’t even been to my first duty station. I was hanging out with a friend and somehow a conversation was started with a nearby table and a woman called me a sellout, as an ethnic person I was selling out working for the country that continues to oppress us.
She was Vietnamese, her parents had come from Vietnam and now had a successful restaurant. She was a college student that believed that she had two strikes against her in the United States because she was both female and Asian. I tried to explain that in our county you could be anything you want as long as you put in the work. She didn’t listen. So I asked her where she wanted to go. I said that on my little private’s salary I would but her a one way ticket to anywhere in the world. She didn’t take me up on it.
I have had someone argue that since we won the cold war that the military should be disbanded. Why do we need a military if the Soviet Union is no longer a threat? Of course forgetting that the breakup created a number of unstable countries, some that suddenly found themselves independent and a nuclear power all at the same time.
The best part of the day was that five feet inside the door of that party were two guys from Bosnia. I was able to throw what little Serbo-Croatian I remembered and told them I had been in their country less than three months prior. They were very happy that I had been a soldier helping to bring stability to their country. While I was in an argument with the idiot girl, they were getting my friend drunk on vodka. I had defended their country, Neil was my friend, so he was a friend of theirs, and therefore was getting me drunk once removed. (It all makes drunk logic sense) For the record while he did throw up, not in the car and even though he passed out as soon as we got him home, he was able to wake up next to a hot blonde Russian chick the next morning, you can’t tell me I’m not the best friend/wingman ever.
But I am getting away from the topic. How do you bring your A game? First it helps if you have spent a significant amount of time in a third world country. Getting drunk at Senor Frogs during spring break does not count. Second, how do you give back to the world as a whole? If you just take up space, you don’t get to talk to me. Giving blood is the easiest thing you can do to save a life. If you can’t find 15 minutes out of your life a couple times a year to at least give blood, you are just taking up space. And while if you have gotten a tattoo recently they won’t allow you to give blood, if you didn’t already donate, the excuse is bullshit.
If your argument is based on media sound bites and your solution can be given in one breath, I have to hit you. Not that I will want to, I have to. You are too stupid to be let loose on the world without an ass kicking from time to time. And letting you walk around with that stupidity so close to the surface is doing the world a disservice. Also I will rip apart your silly, useless argument like a pitbull on a ham sandwich and it will make you look stupid. Like many others you will try to dig your heels in, and it will only serve to make you look worse. For wasting my time I will punish you, you will cry and I will point and laugh.
Here is the big one, before you approach me you have to have already looked at both sides of the argument. For example if you say there is no reason we should have invaded Iraq, then that tells me that despite all the information out there you have only heard whatever supports your argument. If you are that closed off it means you are not open to other points. And if I have to waste my time, again I will have to hit you. At some point in the conversation you have to be able to say, “that is a good point, and I have considered it but I think this point is more important.” Or, “I see what you are saying, let me think about that for a minute.” I will keep an open mind, if you don’t I will have to punish you.
And lastly, you have to remember the facts of the past, know what is happening in the present, and consider the future. The military had a different plan for going into Falluja, if you do not know why they went in the way they did, you can’t argue the point. Also presently that is one of the areas in Iraq that proves democracy can work in the country.
So don’t come at me with the same tired, “the US didn’t find WMDs in Iraq so we should leave,” argument. There are no simple answers to complex international issues. And if you tell me some crap about how Bush lied and the war is unjust I will hold out my hand and expect my reparations.
White people (I haven’t made fun of you in a while) hate it when you fault them for slavery. And at this point it makes sense, black people are very much a part of America. So rather than look back and be mad about how we got here, we need to think about where we are going from here.
It is too late to do “take backs” on Iraq. Our military is there. Like it or not. The question is where we go from here? And where do we go that will have the most positive lasting effects? Not just something that makes us feel good in the short term.
I would like to make it clear that I have nothing against liberals. I was using Iraq as examples because that is what most people can understand readily. Liberals are fine in my book, it is the useless ones that drive me crazy. Especially when they are all talk and no action. The reason they are not taken seriously is because they just make a lot of noise and in the end do nothing. All you have to do is distract them with something shiny and they lose focus. Remember how the government finally said they were going to reduce the number of troops in Iraq? The liberal felt like they won, and in the end there was no sizable reduction in force. And any reduction was part of a plan already in place. That is how you handle liberals. Meanwhile there are people like me out there doing the work.
Seriously, my parents voted for Anderson, they might as well just have voted for Regan. As much as they talk about whatever it is they whine about (I stopped listening a long time ago, now I just mock them) they really don’t do anything. They sit in their living room and quietly hate the President, meanwhile recently I dropped off 500kg of wheat seed and three truckloads of food, clothes, school supplies and clothing to a village in Southern Afghanistan. Which was not part of my job by the way, and it was stuff I “acquired” so who do you think made a bigger impact on the world?
Again, I am not anti-liberal. I have a self proclaimed tree hugging liberal friend. She worked as a bartender at my favorite restaurant before the new owner ruined it. We could hang out and have all kinds of discussions. These were an exchange of ideas and I remember having to go home to think about some of the stuff she said. That is fine with me. It is a lot better than last year when I had to take some community college kids by the hand and explain that the world is a big place and that there are things outside their area code that matter.
Okay, I am getting off my soapbox now. I had to vent that out before I went to bed. And now I feel better. Just remember, even if you feel smart, do not approach me to have some lively debate unless you bring your A game. I have been running with the big dogs for a long time. If you show up with your B game, or don’t bring anything to the table, like a fresh perspective, I am going to punish you. Remember I grew up in a liberal area, do you really thing I haven’t heard your argument before?
