No matter how prepared you may think you are, you never really know until the time.
Things have been up in the air as to whether or not my son would deploy with his unit to Iraq on July 7th. Technically, he does not have to go, because he has already served 5 consecutive years on deployment status. (He volunteered to serve with other units that were in need of men when those units were deployed.)
He just phoned me to say that a position has become available and he needs to make a decision by tomorrow morning as to whether or not he wishes to deploy back to Iraq with his unit that is now being called up for the first time.
Things have been hanging in the balance over the past several months. Now as things get down to the wire and things are in the 11th hour, a decision needs to be made.
I just don't know if I have it in me to do this again. It was so hard before. I lived for those phone calls and email that told me that he was still alive and alright. How can I possibly go through this again? As a mother, it was one of the most painful experiences of my life.
Now I wait. I wait for his decision.
