AlexMac66AKAMrNiceGuy66's blog: "Some constructive criticism please."

I'm writing a book.I need feedback.Honesty and any helpful remarks will be greatly appreciated.Below is a blurb from my book.

Prologue

The Dreamer Awakens

I guess if it werent' for the recurring dream I have I would never have survived what came next.Alerted to wakefulness,I could hear a chittering sound,like teeth...LOTS of teeth and the slithering of something wet across the floor.My head was pounding.Something was wrong here,VERY wrong.I dove out of bed just in time to see the giant sluglike creature leap onto where I had just vacated.A Hellworm.....All teeth and VERY hungry.Rows of needle-like fangs lining its gullet.I dove naked for the window as it slid off my bed,its body making a loud,wet plopping sound.It lunged at me as I threw myself through the glass.I quickly got up and ran along the fire escape,not daring to look back.A loud keening sound came from it.I dropped to the ground and hit it running.Where I didn't know.Glancing back I could see it's head poking through the window,keening it's evil sound.The weather was freezing.Snow blowing around me,near blinding me.I just ran...and ran.Why was I targeted?What had I done?I thought this part of my life was over.Who could have done this?My head was spinning.I eventually fell to my knees,exhausted.Finally looking around,I had come to the one place I thought I'd be safe....Jills.I knocked.The door opened slowly.Last thing I remember before collapsing at her feet was seeing her worried face.......