She kicked that treebranch as hard as she could out of her way, hating it for stopping what was up to this point a very therapeutic skating session. Now with presence of mind gone, and pain from her kiss with the bikepath, she decided she couldnt do any more out there today.
spying a parkbench she made her way to it and sat down. Untying her skates, her mind reeled back to everything she had been holding inside until now.
"alot of baggage here" she thought.
Sarcasm took over jus for a moment and wondered if the Salvation army would appreciate me dumping it all on them as a donation? " Hell i wont even ask for a donation reciept. I didnt want to be greedy or selfish. I'd share everything i have in this life, why not my baggage too!
Not believing it was a viable option, she just sat there wondering what to do next.
God...you created me in your image to do good things as you would have them done, i have done everything you have asked of me, without questioning, without reservations. I have patiently listened for your voice in the gentle breeze, I have found your comfort in a beautiful sunset, the eyes of a laughing child. In the time I have come to know you and listen to you, you have allowed by your plan 4 of my babies to become angels of yours in heaven, four from my own body, and in my pain i did not curse you.
In that time you have allowed me to marry. And in my heart I embraced them with the Love you wouldve wanted me to give them knowing all along in your wisdom I would not be successful in those endeavors.
I made my mistakes and each time i thought i grew with them and became a better person.
I have loved every person you brought my way, in a smile, or a comforting hug, a word of encouragement.
I bonded i cared i hurt i loved, and each time you took from me the very gifts you gave to me to appreciate.
WHY? WHY WONT YOU LET ME BE HAPPY?
WHY do you hate me God?
If man and woman were designed to be together then why have you set me apart to be alone, when at the end of the day i want, and need and crave with desire the ability to be one with another.
My heart is Full. You wanted it this way..Then Please let this door be opened to me.
She got up from the parkbench just as angry as when she sat down. Exhaustion racked her from head to toe and she needed to get home where perhaps a hot bath and some pain meds would begin the soothing process. She eased herself down into the Jasmine and Sweetpea bouquet of bubbles, hoping to relax her body and wash the bad air from her mind.
After about 20 minutes the effect of the Oxy and muscle relaxants mix was loosening her up. a lil lightheaded but starting to feel better. The percoset always had an unexpected side effect with her ..it increased her arousal sexually.
Her hands began to gently slide the bubbles over her breast. With each careful slide of her hands she gently increased the pressure on her hardening nipples. With each and every stroke her breathing became deeper and now focusing on caressing her own body, imagining her mans hands on her...the way she wants him to touch her and arouse her. Following the contour of her own body, she made her way from nipples to her stomach, then outlining and caressing the curves of her hips. Feeling her own softness in the water just served to intensify her want, and she felt an aching of need from her womanness below. Oh she needed sweet release, and there was going to be no turning back from this...
Tracing lines in the bubbles her soft hands made their way slowly from outer hips to inner thighs, making smiley faces in the white sea of wonderful soap....coming up to her mound her palm covered her vaginal area, then with her fingers selectively placed, she spread her labias apart and slid her fingers inside of them and moved them with a towards her motion. Her lower lips have carefully concealed the silky lubrication of her own making. Not thin as the warm water around her, but a pure perfect thickness and silkiness by design..natures design to allow for enjoyment.
She was starting to feel a lil naughty, and guilty. She wanted to share this with him. Not this time....and not knowing when again, she made the decision to indulge her inner self. Finding her clitoris and realizing it had already become swollen with desire, engorged and ready to recieve whatever touches and sensations she gave it. With her middle finger, she began making love to herself...envisioning his touch, his fingers intertwining with hers, on her body, his kisses there....... his tongue......
and she moaned and purred delightfully with each image she had of his lovemaking to her...overshowering her... taking complete control of her mind, her passions. Was he thinking of her today? She wondered....
With the last few rhythmical strokes of her fingers she saw blinding white, and her body arched her hips up and exploded in pulsating passion and release. An orgasm that had been held hostage for way too long. she collapsed back down into the tub a lil too hard , then realized that altho she felt wonderful again in her bittersweet release alone....she also realized she wasnt going to be able to get out on the skates for a few more days.
The fall had made that descision for her................DAMN!