I miss the look in your eye, the way your hair would fall. I miss the way you would wrap your arms around me and tell me everything was gonna be okay. I miss the way you was always there. but most of all I miss my friend, the one that my heart and soul felt the safest with, the one that knew just what to say to make me smile again. I miss laying my head in your lap watching some old navy movie because you loved those. How we would sit on the window seal and drink coffee and talk about everything didn't matter what as long as we was near each other.
I miss the colors you braught into my life, You're golden smile the blue greenish eyes, I miss your voice in lonely times like now telling me everything will be alright.
I miss those times, I miss those nights, I even miss our pillow fights, the late after noon walk, the movies we would watch.
Now, I sit here and it's almost 2 years since I lost you.. Still, the pain is there. I felt worthless I couldn't stop the pain you was in.. I couldn't take it away from you. The day we had to put you in the ground was the day I lost all my faith. I lost a part of me that I wasn't sure I would ever get back. My world turned to nothing but darkness. I miss my friend, My uncle.... So many things that are left unsaid.. So many things that I want you to see I want you to be there for. Times passes so quickly but I thought you would be here forever.. I never even had a chance to say goodbye. There's so many things to tell you! Left unsaid until now, do you even hear me when I talk to you at night? Do the words I say even make it through? Cause I would give anything if I just knew. Every night I have the same dream the one where you get to hold me, we laugh and talk until the morning and than you vanish.. It always leaves me feeling helpless when I wake up and you're not there. Do you know how much I would love to be there with you? Living in this world without you. I have to search through my memories hopen that I find something that I've passed over. All that I took for granted means so much now. I won't let it go, I wear your chain to remember you it stays around my neck. I never wanted you to leave, I never wanted you to go through the pain you went through..
I remember when I was little I would get off school and you would be there to pick me up.. You would stop everything you was doing just to come get me in the afternoon. We would go home and start a fire and talk about our days, than I would make dinner than we would eat it just sitting around laughing. How I never needed anything because in this world I had everything I had a best friend that was also my uncle.. I had you, the one that could make me smile. I miss you more than you will ever know. It's hard to go on day after day knowing I can't see you, knowing when I need someone so much that you're not here. Having to be so strong knowing down deep inside I'm not by far...
