Mary had a little pig, She kept it fat and plastered;
And when the price of pork went up, She shot the little bastard.
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MARY HAD A LITTLE LAMB Her father shot it dead.
Now it goes to school with her, Between two hunks of bread.
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JACK AND JILL Went up the hill To have a little fun.
Stupid Jill forgot the pill; And now they have a son.
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HUMPTY DUMPTY sat on a wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the kings' horses, And all the kings' men.
Had scrambled eggs, For breakfast again.
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HEY DIDDLE, DIDDLE the cat, took a piddle, All over the bedside clock.
The little dog laughed to see such fun. Then died of electric shock.
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GEORGIE PORGY Pudding and Pie,
Kissed the girls and made them cry.
And when the boys came out to play,
He kissed them too 'cause he was gay.
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There was a little girl who had a little curl
Right in the middle of her forehead.
When she was good, she was very, very good.
But when she was bad........
She got a fur coat, jewels, a waterfront condo, and a sports car.