Emotions are a funny thing. I sit here today feeling totally lost, I am happy and sad at the same time. I have many reason to be happy its a beautiful day got a new car recently engaaged and iam alive but sad because my boys have decided to not have anything to do with me. I have only wanted the best for them both, i have always been here for them loved them and protected them the best i could. But they wont call text or speak to me at all, i wonder how it is you can love people and for what them to turn their back on you. I know thats u r kids will break your heart at times in ur life i even understand my 18 yr old i know its time for him to move on but my 15 yr old never thought he could hurt me like he has.I want to smile for my engagment because hes the first man i have known to honestly accept me for me and still love me the way he does and the car wow. but i still find my self crying and feeling sick at how my boys are doing me, think iam ready for a trip to a nut ward, lol.