My friend DL says, "I know this website you need be on. I'm on it."
"Uh-huh, what kind of website?"
He goes on to explain it. The website, we'll just call it Dcon, is a gay fetish site.
"And, I need to be on this why?" I'm the all-American guy next door, who's only opposition to vanilla is the fact that I know DL.
"Here let me show you." He commanders the computer and brings up the site with member pics. I'm not shocked. How can I be after meeting DL? Also, the members seem to look average for the most part. Okay, a few are a little out there, but the fetishes aren't anything unimaginable.
"You should start a profile," he says. "You'd like it."
"DL, are you trying to corrupt me?"
"Yes. Is it working?"
"No."
"Tim . . . Are ya scared?"
"No."
"Then try it, you don't know until you try."
"Actually, I can pretty much know without trying."
"Let's just create a membership for you and if you want to delete it later you can. Come on, it'll be fun. Yah? Come on, yah?" He shakes his head like the energizer bunny on a crack and speed frenzy -- the look in his eyes matches.
"Or we can save time and just not create it."
"No. . . No. . . . Come on, let's do it."
Darn him, he knows me well. While I have no desire to jump into a rubber suit and grab a whip, the psychology behind it all will intrigue me. He sets me up knowing the outcome. Of course, I wait until DL is safely away and no longer an influence. I jam up the music and see what is out there. I log on as the music bellows:
I like black and white (dreaming of black and white)
You like black and white
BOY: "Excuse me Sir, are you CBT, TT, FF?"
ME: No, T.I.M.
BOY: ??
ME: TTYL
If you're in the swing (money ain't everything)
If you're in the swing.
MAN: Looking for someone so down, they don't want to continue on their own and need for me to take full control of their lives.
Me: That person doesn't need you, they just need some help, but couldn't we all use a little, hint, hint.
Oh now can't you wait (love don't come on a plate)
Oh now can't you wait
MAN: I'd love to do erotic hypnotism on you?
ME: Erotic hypno what? Explain?
MAN: Some things can't be explained, only experienced.
ME: Oh, like the itchiness of a rash.
If you gotta crush (don't beat about the bush)
When I gotta crush
BOY: Can I come over and please you, Sir?
ME: Now?
BOY: Yes, Sir. If you want, Sir.
ME: Can you give me an hour to get the body of the last guy buried?
BOY: Yes, Sir.
ME: Okay. . . .
BOY: I can be there in an hour.
BOY: Still there?
BOY: Sir?
See there chameleon
Lying there in the sun
MAN: You are new to this?
ME: Yes, very! I'm here mainly to talk.
MAN: We need to be talking in my dungeon.
All things to everyone
MAN: Here's my phone number, we live close!
BOY: Do you play pool?
Run run away
Run run away
Run run away
CLICK
Some things you shouldn't be messed with or necessarily experienced even by computer proxy. Some of the guys were very nice and I'm sure most were sincere, except for me. I was the fraud. I feel bad for having been there. My apologies if you are one and read this. BTW/ I'm going to get DL for this.