A sense of panic over came my sleep
Total awareness and consciousness
Closed eyes, sleep filled, not moving, not blinking
Aware and not liking, loathing the helplessness
Don’t stir, don’t move, it may worsen
Why the constant pursuit when it’s not right
Not brought about, pushed away
Far from being able to cry out yet yelling inside
A sudden shirt – He rests – He waits
Move a little, don’t give in, try and hide the facts
Let him know you aren’t happy, don’t respond
Wishing it done, just wanting peace, to be left alone
Was it caused by me, in anyway?
Trying harder to ignore as more persistent he tries
When will it ever be over my torment
Don’t lose control, anger go away, detach, be gone!
It’s over as I shift again, please be done
Safe for awhile, hoping for it to last, knowing it won’t
Not long after it persists I just want to scream
Run away hide, forever, help, slashing my soul
Every good girl tries to avoid it
Every bad girl invites it, almost asks for it
No precautions good enough to keep the demon away
Welcoming it with open arms for comfort
A short times comfort causing many pains
It’s done, the alarm goes off
It’s safe to wake, have my senses be my own
Don’t let in, it may be worse
Leading on, teasing playing a game
It’s not a game, it’s my life, return it to me
Be gone; go away, it’s not okay
It’s my life, return it to me!
