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Why is it that I put all of myself into something r someone, only to be taken on a ride and led on......? Why is it that I do nothing but everything for someone only to be stomped on and made to feel inadequate and less than mediocre. Why do I feel that if I try even harder, that I'll be wanted and excepted and that someone or something will want to change because I'm so damn special they know if they lose me it'd be very hard to move on...? But what if I',m not that great...or what if I keep putting up with all the bullshit....? Wht if I really staart not caring....? What if my spirit is broken....and I remain an empty shell of the person I once was.....? I feel the life being sucked out of me but I do nothing to stop it because I know it's useless....because I'm halfway there... --Daphne Du Maurier Frenchmans Creek
So......Anyways....Yeah. First Official Blog. I don't even know what to type. So many things are battleing for primary focus in the war that is my brain. Lol. Where to begin...Hmmm....Well, for starters. I have a man whom I love very much.....Who's going through quite the hardship(s) right now......and Its so hard because...I just want to be there for him....help him out.....yet....theres really nothing I can do. This makes me feel helpless, which in turn, makes me fuckin pissed off like someone just pissed in the farm-fresh milk I poured on my Wheaties....only worse....Annnnnddddd....I dunno......Shit sucks sometimes you know?...Moral of the story? I have no idea.......I just love 'im...:P
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