I love my dad. He's where I get my weird sense of humor.
One day my mother calls and says "GUESS what your FATHER is doing."
"Got no clue, Ma. Tell me."
"He's mowing the lawn."
WTF? "What's so weird about that?"
She paused for dramatic effect, "He's naked."
"WHAT?" I was befuddled, perplexed, confused, flabbergasted, AND almost speechless.
"Yep."
"Mom, this is very important. Is he mowing the front lawn (please god no, there's no fence!), or the back lawn?" (cross your fingers, pray for the back lawn)
Again she pauses, what is it with this woman and torture? "The back lawn. I'm getting the camera."
As I hear her picking up the camera, switching it on, and chuckling to herself while she walks to the back door, I wonder what in the world possessed him? There was no way he could explain this one. No possible reason at all. With this little stunt, I finally had him!!
"Mike! Say cheese!" My mother called sweetly.
"Shit!" My father responded.
"Too late. Got it." Ah, the satisfaction in my mother's voice the day she snapped the picture of my dad buttnaked running away from the lawnmower, trying desperately to make it to the side of the house before she pushed the button.
"Here he is, Beetle-bee." (She called me beetle-bee, aww.)
My dad's voice comes on the line "Ehyeaw?" (For those of you not from Texas, this roughly translates out to Yes? What do you want?)
Okay, let's see what he has to say for himself. There's no logical explanation for this one.
"Why, in the WORLD, would you be mowing the lawn NAKED?"
"Well, I was hot." He said simply.
Goddammit, I can't argue with that!!!!
