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BUSH'S RESIGNATION SPEECH Latest Version
The following 'speech' was written recently by an ordinary Maine-iac [a resident of the People's Republic of Maine ]. While satirical in nature, all satire must have a basis in fact to be effective. This is an excellent piece by a person who does not write for a living.
The speech George W. Bush might give: []
Normally, I start these things out by saying 'My Fellow Americans.' Not doing it this time. If the polls are any indication, I don't know who more than half of you are anymore. I do know something terrible has happened, and that you're really not fellow Americans any longer. I'll cut right to the chase here: I quit. Now before anyone gets all in a lather about me quitting to avoid impeachment, or to avoid prosecution or something, let me assure you: There's been no breaking of laws or impeachable offenses in this office. [] The reason I'm quitting is simple. I'm fed up with you people. I'm fed up because you have no understanding of what's really going on in the world. Or of what's going on in this once-great nation of ours. And the majority of you are too damned lazy to do your homework and figure it out. Let's start local. You've been sold a bill of goods by politicians and the news media. [] Meanwhile, all you can do is whine about gas prices, and most of you are too damn stupid to realize that gas prices are high because there's increased demand in other parts of the world, and because a small handful of noisy idiots are more worried about polar bears and beachfront property than your economic security. We face real threats in the world. Don't give me this 'blood for oil' thing. If I were trading blood for oil I would've already seized Iraq 's oil fields and let the rest of the country go to hell. And don't give me this 'Bush Lied...People Died' crap either. If I were the liar you morons take me for, I could've easily had chemical weapons planted in Iraq so they could be 'discovered.' Instead, I owned up to the fact that the intelligence was faulty. [] Let me remind you that the rest of the world thought Saddam had the goods, same as me. Let me also remind you that regime change in Iraq was official US policy before I came into office. Some guy named ' Clinton ' established that policy. Bet you didn't know that, did you? Now some of you morons want to be led by a junior senator with no understanding of foreign policy or economics, and this nitwit says we should attack Pakistan , a nuclear ally. And then he wants to go to Iran and make peace with a terrorist who says he's going to destroy us. While he's doing that, he wants to give Iraq to al Qaeda, Afghanistan to the Taliban, Israel to the Palestinians, and your money to the IRS so the government can give welfare to illegal aliens, who he will make into citizens, so they can vote to re-elect him. He also thinks it's okay for Iran to have nuclear weapons, and we should stop our foreign aid to Israel . Did you sleep through high school? You idiots need to understand that we face a unique enemy. Back during the cold war, there were two major competing political and economic models squaring off. We won that war, but we did so because fundamentally, the Communists wanted to survive, just as we do. We were simply able to out spend and out-tech them. [] That's not the case this time. The soldiers of our new enemy don't care if they survive. In fact, they want to die. That'd be fine, as long as they weren't also committed to taking as many of you with them as they can. But they are. They want to kill you, and the bastards are all over the globe. You should be grateful that they haven't gotten any more of us here in the United States since September 11. But you're not. That's because you've got no idea how hard a small number of intelligence, military, law enforcement, and homeland security people have worked to make sure of that. When this whole mess started, I warned you that this would be a long and difficult fight. I'm disappointed how many of you people think a long and difficult fight amounts to a single season of 'Survivor.' [] Instead, you've grown impatient. You're incapable of seeing things through the long lens of history, the way our enemies do. You think that wars should last a few months, a few years, tops. Making matters worse, you actively support those who help the enemy. Every time you buy the New York Times, every time you send a donation to a cut-and-run Democrat's political campaign, well, dang it, you might just as well Fed Ex a grenade launcher to a Jihadist. It amounts to the same thing. In this day and age, it's easy enough to find the truth. It's all over the Internet. It just isn't on the pages of the New York Times, USA Today, or on NBC News. But even if it were, I doubt you'd be any smarter. Most of you would rather watch American Idol or Dancing with Stars. I could say more about your expectations that the government will always be there to bail you out, even if you're too stupid to leave a city that's below sea level and has a hurricane approaching. [] I could say more about your insane belief that government, not your own wallet, is where the money comes from. But I've come to the conclusion that were I to do so, it would sail right over your heads. So I quit. I'm going back to Crawford. I've got an energy-efficient house down there (Al Gore could only dream) and the capability to be fully self-sufficient for years. No one ever heard of Crawford before I got elected, and as soon as I'm done here pretty much no one will ever hear of it again. Maybe I'll be lucky enough to die of old age before the last pillars of America fall. [] Oh, and by the way, Cheney's quitting too. That means Pelosi is your new President. You asked for it. Watch what she does carefully, because I still have a glimmer of hope that there are just enough of you remaining who are smart enough to turn this thing around in 2008. So that's it. God bless what's left of America . Some of you know what I mean. The rest of you, kiss off.. PS - You might want to start learning Farsi, and buy a Koran.

CHICAGO POLITICS

CHICAGO POLITICS
BODY COUNT IN THE LAST SIX MONTHS 292 MURDERED IN CHICAGO 221 KILLED IN IRAQ
OUR LEADERSHIP IN ILLINOIS ; SEN. BARACK OBAMA SEN. DICK DURBIN REP. JESSE JACKSON , JR. GOV. ROD BLOGOJEVICH HOUSE LEADER MIKE MADIGAN ATTY. GEN LISA MADIGAN MAYOR RICHARD DALY ALL DEMOCRATS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
THANK YOU FOR THE COMBAT ZONE IN CHICAGO
CAN'T BLAME THE REPUBLICANS, BECAUSE THERE AREN'T ANY.!!!!!
STATE PENSION FUND $44 BILLION IN DEBT, WORST IN THE NATION.
COOK COUNTY ( CHICAGO ) SALES TAX 10.25%, HIGHEST IN THE NATION.
CHICAGO SCHOOL SYSTEM ONE OF THE WORST IN THE NATION.
THIS IS THE POLITICAL MACHINE THAT OBAMA COMES FROM IN ILLINOIS .
AND NOW
OBAMA SAYS HE'S GONNA 'FIX' WASHINGTON !!!!! SPREAD THE WORD

Dear Mr. Obama,

This letter is so well written, it may even make some of his supporters think twice; or maybe not. Nonetheless it has 7 remarkably great questions to the type of man he is. I don't know who Mark Gregg is but I am so glad this eloquent letter is circulating.....please help keep it going.
Dear Mr. Obama, It is August 30, 2008. My name is Mark Gregg. I am a 50 something conservative white male. I have followed your campaign closely, including the speeches you and others made at the democratic national convention. I am respectfully providing you with seven simple (probably shallow) reasons why I could never vote for you. I believe my opinion is shared by many people. While there may not be quite enough to prevent you from becoming president of this nation, I do think there is an awakening to the fact that you are not a (the) messiah that the media and liberal Hollywood entertainers are trying to portray you. 1. I hear your mantra of change,, change. Yet, you picked a long term, liberal, Washington insider (Joe Biden) to be your running mate. This is NOT change. It is a move that hypocritically refutes the very thing you supposedly stand for. Your campaign then slammed McCain for picking Sarah Palin, apparently, because she is NOT a Washington insider. She is a maverick who cleaned-up Alaska's quagmire of political scandals. Which way is it, Barack? Is it okay for you to pick a Washington insider under the mantra of 'change', but not okay for John McCain to pick a smart, aggressive, reformer? 2. You have the single most liberal voting record in the senate. This indicates to me and others like me that you may very well be an angry black man seeking to punish our country for sins of a different generation. I am not racist. I have some biases just like you and every other human alive. Unlike the democratic party who claims to be for the minority (but their record heavily refutes this), I will give any person who truly needs help, help. I married a 'minority' girl 35 years ago (she is Hispanic) and have seen the evils of prejudice first hand. However, I have also seen my wife and my children and others in her family throw off the veil of self imposed prejudicial bondage and move ahead. They love our country and do not view themselves any different than I view myself as a citizen of this country. Your lovely wife so disappointed people like me during this campaign when she stated it was the first time she had ever been proud of this country. She apparently never noticed the massive aid we give dozens of other countries. She apparently never noticed the sacrifice of literally millions of veterans who helped make this country a free nation and helped liberate other nations from brutal dictators such as Adolf Hitler. She apparently does not remember that she attended ivy league universities with scholarship money that ultimately (at least some of it) was paid for by our taxes. This troubles me more than you know. She is an angry black woman who appears to not like her country very much. I don't want her representing me to the rest of the world. 3. You claim Christianity but apparently do not realize that the Bible teaches that he who does not work, does not eat. The Bible does not say or even suggest that he who CANNOT work, should not eat. Yet, your liberal policies reward people who are capable of working, but choose to not do so. This bothers me. I know that if you are elected our taxes will spiral upwards. You should heed the words of Winston Churchill: 'We contend that for a nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle.' If I like anything about you, it is your campaign promise to balance the federal budget. Unfortunately, we have heard this a huge number of times from a number of different politicians and we realize that when you energize the very liberal Nancy Pelosi, Robert Byrd, Ted Kennedy, etc, etc, and the many other democrats like them, a balanced budget will never, ever happen on your watch. 4. During your question and answer session with Rick Warren of Saddleback Church your answer concerning the question of where does life begin, stunned me: 'Above your pay grade?' Does this mean when something bad happens as President of this nation that you are going to look at your salary to determine if you can respond? I am sorry, but this was the most serious gaffe I have seen you make. Frankly, it shows me that you are pandering in the most obvious manner. You will choose your words not from your heart, but from an agenda that I believe is still hidden from the American people. 5. If anything stands out about you it is probably your appeasement mentality. In this era of rampant, radical Islamic extremism and with the latest stunt pulled by the re-energized Russian government, I am not sure appeasement is healthy. I again revert to the words of Winston Churchill: 'An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.' 6. You and your party tacitly believe that a 13 or 14 year old girl must have the parents approval to have the school nurse provide them with a Tylenol when they have a headache at school. Yet, this same girl can become pregnant and the school can skirt her off to a clinic and abort the child in her body without the parents knowing or being notified. This scares the hell out of me. You have two little girls. Would you be upset if this happened to them and you were not informed? Then why do you stand for this? It makes no sense to me. 7. My seventh and final point (for now) is your supporters. I have watched the Hollywood entertainers that support you, systematically embrace Hugo Chavez of Venezuela and others like him. I see the continuous smut and garbage produced by Hollywood, the very people who promote you the most vigorously. It is not a positive point to me and others like me to see these over-paid, bizarre, poor examples of human existence fawn over you and push you and your liberal agenda as hard as they do. The way I see it; When the devil is for you, we should question whether or not we should be against you. In closing, I just want you to know that you scare me. I cannot vote for you. It is not because of your skin color. It is because these items I've listed and many, many others like them. Do not claim that my dislike for you is race based. It is because I do not feel you have the best interests of this nation at heart. Respectfully, Mark A. Gregg

Obama in Battle Creek, MI

MORE NEWS ABOUT OBAMA AND THIS ONE TURNS MY STOMACH!
From Michigan State Trooper Jason Kern who is a member of the Michigan Tactical Officers Association (MTOA); you can click on the MTOA Web site below, or contact Trooper Kern to verify this information by sending an E-mail to him at his listed E-mail address below. All Uniformed Federal, State, and Local Law Enforcement Officers should read Trooper Kern's E-mail and pass it on to your fellow Law Enforcement Officers. Respectfully, ~~~~~~~~~ Former Federal Law Enforcement Officer and FBI Intelligence Analyst _____ Subject: Obama in Battle Creek, MI From the original sender: As many of you know, I have several friends in law enforcement here in town. This was written by someone in the MI state police that worked at the local rally when Obama came to town. It's worth taking the time to read it Please pass this along to everyone that you have on your e-mail list because this is just the beginning, if this arrogant, egotistical, super liberal, president wannabe gets into office.... To all, I have read all of the emails from not only some of the MTOA board members, but from other Law Enforcement & Military personnel about Barack Obama's rudeness and what seems to be disgust for basically anyone in uniform. Well, it's my turn to add to the list of emailers and here it is: Some members of the Calhoun County Sheriff's Department, MSP, and other local agencies inside Calhoun County are working with Secret Service in the security of Mr. Obama. Mr. Obama's bus arrives in Battle Creek and pulls into the stadium area. Before Mr. Obama exits the bus, he has the Secret Service get off and tell all Law Enforcement personnel in uniform that they now have to stand behind the bus so Mr. Obama is not seen with anyone in a Law Enforcement uniform before he gets off or while in the public view. So, everyone from MSP, Sheriff's Dept., and other agencies looks at each other for a brief second, goes and stands behind the bus out of sight so Mr. Obama does not have to see, or been seen with, what to him is 'undesirables' since he refuses to been seen or even acknowledge Military or Law Enforcement. At a time of war and terrorism in our world, this presidental candidate who is being protected by various branches of the military & law enforcement at the tax payers expense, refuses to acknowledge, be seen with, have in his photographed background, any type of Military or Law Enforcement in uniform. But this is not in the media or headlines in the news. Why? I wonder what the story or media frenzy would be if it was muslims, blacks, whites, jews, or any other race, gender, religon, and/or occupation, that Mr. Obama refuses to be seen with or have around him. Why would Law Enforcement branches make this up? Law Enforcement traditionally has had more funding under Democrats. Just food for thought leading up to November 4th. Jason Kern Michigan Tactical Officer's Association Executive Board Member Training Committee

OBAMA WITCH PROJECT

Republicans don't need to dress up for Halloween this year. They're scaring the pants off Barack Obama's followers by their mere presence. Anything they say, wear or do provokes instant cries of "RAAAAACISM!" Wink, blink or think critical thoughts about Obama? You're a bigot! How many racial bogeymen have Obama operatives and sympathetic journalists discovered lurking in "coded language" and attire? Let us count the ways: -- During Tuesday's presidential debate, John McCain referred to Obama as "that one." Official Obama press agitator Bill Burton sent off an e-mail blast to reporters: "Did John McCain just refer to Obama as 'that one'?" Horrors. Taking their cue from Burton, spooked Obama supporters hyperventilated like teenagers on the film set of "The Blair Witch Project." "The racial undertones were subtle but unmistakable," declared Maya Wiley of the leftist Center for Social Inclusion. "McCain was tapping into a current of superiority among white voters. It was an attempt to 'otherize' Obama." "Otherize"? Sounds like something you do to your car tires to prepare for winter. UC Berkeley linguistics professor George Lakoff was also haunted by "That One": "The phrase was meant to say, 'You and I are in the same area, but he's the outsider.'" Memo to McCain: Next time, call him "The One." -- Obama supporters on the heavily trafficked Democratic Underground website (where such mainstream Democrats as Elizabeth Edwards hang out) saw the ghost of the Ku Klux Klan in Sarah Palin's white suit jacket. Yes, white clothes equal racism. "Palin is wearing white again, inciting the racist crowds. She should just drop all pretense and put on her white hood and light up a cross. She is a despicable human being," fumed a DU poster. "Grand Princess of the KKK," proclaimed another. They're "trying to send subtle signals to their rabid base," declared yet another member of Obama's rabid base. My racial decoder ring must be on the fritz. I'm not getting the signal. If she wears white stockings, drinks a vanilla milkshake and refers to budgetary black holes, are those incitements, too? And what about her gorgeous white teeth? Perhaps she should drink more coffee -- hold the white cream! -- to avoid emitting further racial radiation. -- Such paranoia is not limited to the fever swamps of the Internet. Earlier this week, the Associated Press disseminated an "analysis" accusing Palin of injecting a "racial tinge" into the campaign because she criticized Obama for his longtime relationship with Weather Underground terrorist Bill Ayers. Palin's comments were completely unobjectionable: "This is not a man who sees America like you and I see America." I saw a vice presidential candidate drawing stark philosophical differences between two tickets. The AP saw Freddy Krueger with lipstick and a noose. "Whether intended or not by the McCain campaign, portraying Obama as 'not like us' is another potential appeal to racism. It suggests that the Hawaiian-born Christian is, at heart, un-American," the AP piece frothed. Obama is half-black. Ayers is white. One of the Weather Underground's victims was black police officer Waverly Brown of Nyack, N.Y. Where do I buy a pair of the super X-ray glasses that can detect the racism in Palin's remarks about the Obama-Ayers alliance? -- I'll have to borrow those hysterical-colored spectacles from Time's Karen Tumulty, who spotted racist goblins in the recent McCain ad criticizing Obama for seeking advice from Fannie Mae corruptocrat Franklin Raines. "Sinister images of two black men, followed by one of a vulnerable-looking elderly white woman," Tumulty balked in a blog post titled "McCain plays the race card." Um, "sinister"? The ad's photos of Obama and Raines were standard shots -- some with dour expressions, others smiling. The fact that Tumulty perceived them as "sinister" suggests that she should perform a self-racism exam before diagnosing anyone else. -- A parade of congressional witch hunters for Obama also detects the specter of George Wallace behind every policy bush. Democratic New York Gov. David Paterson says conservative criticism of Obama's community organizing days is code for "black." Democratic Rep. Gregory Meeks complained to the New York Observer: "They are trying to throw out these codes." In the same piece, Democratic Rep. Yvette Clark divined segregationist intent in Palin's references to Joe Six-Pack and hockey moms. "It leaves a lot of people out." And Democratic Sen. Majority Leader Harry Reid echoed Time's Tumulty on the McCain camp's Obama/Raines broadsides: "The only connection that people could bring up about Raines and Barack Obama is that they both are African-American, other than that there is nothing." The Washington Post reported that Obama's office phoned Raines for housing advice and has stood by its reporting. Is the newspaper part of the McCain/Palin hooded racists' coven, too? Obama's witch hunters better beware. When there's racism in every hiccup, nobody's air supply is safe.
George Hussein Onyango Obama, half-brother of presidential candidate Barack Obama, declared to Vanity Fair last month that “no one knows I exist.” When strangers inquire about his surname, George denies his relationship to the famous Obama: “I say we are not related. I am ashamed.” Why? George Obama lives in a delapidated hut outside Nairobi, earns less than one dollar a month, and, as he says, “I have scars from defending myself with my fists.” Fortunately for George, Minnesota resident Tim Anderson has launched a Web site, HelpObamasBrother.org, to raise money for him. The site declares its mission on the front page: “If Barack Obama won’t send his brother George a few bucks for rent, we can step up and help a brother out.” “We want to help George finance an apartment and college tuition,” said Anderson, who launched the site after seeing a report about the younger Obama on CNN International. “He needs a hand up and we are going to give it to him. The first step, though, is getting him into sanitary living conditions.” According to Vanity Fair, George currently lives without electricity or running water. However, he hopes to move to a safer part of the city and enroll in a technical college. Anderson said he is skeptical of Obama’s commitment to ending poverty in America and abroad, given his treatment of his relatives. “I question why he won’t help his own flesh and blood,” he said. “If a family member of mine was impoverished, I’d help. I’d let them move in with me. Obama says he wants to save Africa, but he can’t start with his own brother?” Anderson, whose site has raised a few hundred dollars so far, said he hopes to travel to Kenya and deliver the money to George in person. “Some Obama supporters appear to be upset by this organization,” Anderson said. “One called and told me I don’t really care about Africans. I said, ‘I can only save one hut at a time.’ I don’t understand why they don’t like it; I’m just trying to help their candidate’s brother.” Barack and Michelle Obama have an estimated net worth of $1.3 million. Barack received a $1.9 million adance for his autobiography, in which he makes one reference to George, describing him as “a beautiful boy with a rounded head.” Anderson said his organization is simply doing what the older Obama ought to be doing for his brother.“Charity should begin at home,” he said. As for anyone who questions his sincerity, “I ask them, ‘why are you offended?’ Are you mad that I’m trying to help Obama’s brother, or are you mad that your candidate isn’t?”
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