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BABY #3?!?!!?

Anyone who knows me or has viewed the pictures on my profile knows that I'm a single father of a handsome little boy named Ethan. He's my world, and I bust my ass on the road so he can have anything he wants or needs. His mother had another little boy over a year ago with another man, and as confusing and frustrating as it may seem, I reserved judgment and kept things civil, all for the sake of my son. And I will admit, being a single parent with 2 children is harder than any full time job. And I won't sit here and try to get on some soap box and berate or insult her, because at the end of the day, she's still the mother of my son. With all that said, I got a phone call earlier today from her. Long story short, she's pregnant for the THIRD time in 3 years!! And yes, by a different man than the guy who fathered the 2nd child. Needless to say, I'm just lost right now. All I can think about is a more difficult struggle than is already happening, money being tight, family drama, baby daddy drama, and more static between her and I. I'm trying to wrap my head around all of this, but I don't think I can. I mean how could you? As hard as it is raising two kids, one of whom the father of is M.I.A., birth control would be the number 1 rule of the bedroom. And I'm not trying to dictate anyone's love life other than my own, but damn, I only have one child, and I've had WAY MORE than my fair share of sex partners. I work hard enough as it is, and I do without so my son can have. And when push comes to shove, I shell out more so that the whole family can keep their heads above water, but now, I just don't know. Especially if the father of the child she's bearing ends up being a deadbeat, also. This all feels like some weird dream that I can't wake up from. I keep telling myself this isn't really happening. But I don't have the luxury of denial. I am a father, and anything involving or affecting my son, you best believe that I'm gonna be there. But how and what will I do, are becoming 2 questions that are getting harder to answer day by day. :|
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