I use you, and abuse you, and i loved you to much.
For sex, to be happy, to relax, to have a friend............
I always turned to you for everything,
I told you my fears and my desires,
Yet you left me with nothing............
All those nights I cried for you
In a sad puddle on the floor with no ambition wishing that I would just die.
All the times i asked you to kill me and you never did,
You never helped me to do it either.
You lied to me with the impression that I would awaken with things new........
But I was always the same crumpled mess.
I gave you years of my life and you gladly took them,
All that I missed because I was looking at you.
Well today i can look back at you and I can say fuck you,
I can say that I havent touched you in over a year,
I dont miss you......... not one bit,
and the hate I have for you only drives me to be better.
I am who I am today be cause I got rid of you and I was glad to see you go.
You amplified everything I hated about myself,
to the point that I wanted to not exist
but today that is done and so am I with you and it has put me in this amazing place.
Instead of "the cutter" or "unreliable" or "wreckless"
I am stronger and I carry on, I knock you down, and every chance I get I'll kick you in the face.
Stay in your rightful place, on the ground, at my feet...........
Because thinking "I had to drink to have things be ok in my life," ..... You've been beat.
I am stronger............
I am, the once was............ alcoholic.
Titanium Butterfly.