decadent blue hues travel across the landscape in my mind and i dream of oceans falling and dancing across the shores of my life
it is with a simple question i ask, is this some deeply profound moment in which i have found love ?
and as the wicked winds rip at my skin as the mourning of acients fills my ears i ask myself am i nothing or am i a refelction in this mirror of hope that carries the breath of my life through eons
my breath breathes and moments like this cast away the shadows that hide in my life and i cry a river as it moves to and fro as it carves its own way and with a glimmer of hope i pray
the whispers the pour through my lips leaving the slience lingering and the quiet words spoken as i invite you "come into the deep waters that are my mind"
and i close my eyes hear her voice as it echos across the landscape that is my soul and i wish small favors of the universe and i dream as time slips through my fingers like the sands of an hour glass
you tread upon my heart with your words, with your soul, with your sigh and memories of an old life and i breathe forever "this is nothing" as it rings in my ears. for i have no place amoung you or with you even away from you as you captivated my soul as i drown in the deep pools that are your eyes and i sleep in the depth of the indigo night
please come to me she says as i stand here lost as i stand here with vacancy in my being as the darkness consumes my heart and i shatter like glass leaving shards of myself for others to see as they walk past me as i lay in this sarcoughgus.
the colors have begun to change and so has my life, my memories fade away into demensions that move acorss time and i step back only to see myself shattered and i pray will his delicate hands piece me back together and will this love or wish of love fill my heart and free me from this fire that burns so deep it incenerates my heart ,
i falter as my steps become weak as my knees give out from under me in pure exhuastion and i look back to lifetimes i have traveled through only to be left more confused
i hope, i pray, i weep will enlightenement ever come to me and i ask myself to love once again but not him, not her but myself
i walk through the demenstions of time waiting for my awakening because i do not recognize it and i pray to love myself, to adore myself, to know what it is to be complete.
i am tired of the wounded healer i am tired of their energy rubbing off on me i am tired of souls that seep like black sludge i am tired of the willful ignorance that seems to blind their vision of what this reality holds in front of them, i am tired of the neivity the innocence that they seem to carry the innocence that is lost from me, i am tired of my bleeding hands as i watch the life pour out of me and move across the hard wood floor.
and then i see a glimmer of who i am and who i am meant to be, i see a glimmer of the life i want so badly, i wait and i weep, i plead and i pray waiting for the moment when my life comes full circle ,and then i see a kelidiscope of color i see my inner chakra released and i know as i travel in this lifetime in the demsions that move far beyond my mind that i walk in time that i walk with you that i breathe you in as your hand touches my face as your arms surround me and i am embraced, although you do not see me, although you do not feel me i know i can bare one more day because he walks beside me , i know i can live one more day because the universe guides me and i know i can live one more day as the kundilini burns like a raging fire within my soul and i know i can live one more day because in all this i see my true destiny....................