I have had yet another night of hell... My loving stepfather came through the kitchen talking shit about wanting to kill my cat and her kittens. Ok so it isn't my cat, she belongs to Laura, but that's neither here nor there. I don't like people talking that kind of shit. So I told him he would do no such thing... Well, let's just say this led to one helluva heated argument, which he walked away from. When my mother went in her room, he started in on her about me,which pissed me off so I went back there and told him to talk shit to me not her. She tried to pull me away and kept saying just to leave him alone, but my hotheaded ass doesn't know when to quit... We got to argueing so bad that he was in my face and I was in his... I wanted to smash his fucking face in.... What pisses me off is how he'll try to antagonize me by saying something quietly and then it seems to others like I'm just rambling on.. He's a sick fuck... I told him I wish he had died in his numerous motorcycle accidents. This is no way to ever talk to anyone. My husband came in the room and grabbed me by my arm which was a huge mistake... before I knew what I was doing I had my fist pulled back and told him if he touched me again I'd knock him the fuck out. I told him how I felt about him and told my stepdad he didn't deserve to breathe my air... ugh... Sometimes I just don't know when to shut up....I was so pissed I was shaking and crying....He treats everyone like they are beneath him... He said that one of us had to go so I told my mother she could keep her shitty husband and my kids and I would leave.... Needless to say after taking time to myself in the bathroom, I decided it was best not to take the kids anywhere at nearly 9pm. Well, he came out of his room and saw me and went back to his room. He came back out dressed and left. My mom asked me if I was ready to give up on my husband which I'm NOT... and she says she isn't ready to give up on hers either... I feel bad that he's gone and we have no clue where he is...but I don't feel bad that I told him what a low life scumbag he is... ugh.... my head hurts from crying... my marriage is hanging on by a thread.. I feel like life is falling apart... I just want a happy family and less drama....... sucks ass..... ugh. any advice? what do you do when you love a man so much you would die for him, and at the same time be so pissed about the things he does...'? do I keep my mouth shut with my wicked stepfather or just tell him how I feel when he's an ass? Anyone out there have a clue....?
patricia
