BobTheGirl's blog: "A Taste of Madness"

Some Notes on Dirty Talk With nearly a decade of varied sexual experience with a modest number of partners I’ve determined myself uncomfortable with a certain manner of coital conversing. Because I recognize that I will encounter more dirty talkers in my future sexual endeavors- because they mask themselves as intelligent men with impressive, or at least inoffensive, vocabularies- I can only hope to raise some awareness regarding appropriate conduct for the dirty talker in the budding sexual relationship. So fellas, please keep reading to ensure that we can come to a compromise in which you can run your filthy mouth without causing my vagina to clench up in sheer disgust. 1. Start out easy. We’ve never done this before. I’m not going to venture into terribly adventurous behavior on our first romp, I figure if things continue to go well, we’ll get to that later. Don’t bust out with how your dick wants to fuck my moist pussy when all I’ve said since the removal of my underpants is “that feels nice.” Take her easy, friend, Rome wasn’t built in a day. 2. I’m going to get more comfortable with this as we go, because I realize you like it and I’m in this as much to please you as in pursuit of my own orgasm. But please don’t use any noun to refer to my anatomy that I don’t use first. I get to set the rules on what we call the vagina, because she’s mine and I have some respect for her. I’ll do the same for you- we can call your penis by any name you express appreciation for. There are lots of words out there I like to use for my vagina. There are a few that my vagina and I don’t like and don’t use and we don’t want to have sex with people who use them. Follow my lead, we’re going to build a colorful vocabulary. 3. Use this dirty talk all you want to make declarative statements and describe your fantasies, but please resist the urge to ask self-indulgent questions. “Do you like my cock?” is perhaps the most insecure and unsexy thing to throw in between the sheets. I’m probably going to let you know via moans, groans and declarative statements how I feel about your penis. At the moment that you ask, there is a chance I’m actually considering your penis. Perhaps I’m comparing it to others in the past, or thinking about how it’s larger/smaller/thicker than I expected. I also might be thinking about the surprisingly high quality of your bedding or the balance in my bank account. The fact is, I’m going to tell you how I feel about your penis when I want to, and when you ask me outright if I love your cock, I’m going to eek out a “yes” that I may or may not mean and resent the interruption. And, for the record, if this is not the first time we’ve fucked, I probably like your penis just fine, have no significant complaints, and find your fishing for compliments pathetic. 4. When the deed is done, acknowledge that our dirty dialog occurred. You can’t get up, hop in the shower, and drift off to sleep without recognizing that you’ve just disclosed your kinky little preference to me. I was there, I noticed, I participated, if you want me to increase my participation next time, now is the time to say “I like to talk dirty while we fuck.” Then I can make a joke, tell you it kind of turned me on, and we can go to sleep in relative comfort. I leave you to figure the rest out on your own, boys. It’ll be fine, the quietest conquest can buzz with your brand of naughty sweet nothings if you stop to consider what you sound like in your lady friend’s ears. We’re girls, we want to pretend you respect us for the twenty minutes you’re thrusting into us. That doesn’t mean we can’t talk for a while about cocks and cunts fucking, it just means there’s got to be a little more thought put into how talking dirty is deployed. bestof

I have a recurring dream about dying in a plane crash. In fact, I had one last night. It's happened so much I feel that I'm as much an expert in dying in plane crashes as any living being can be. I'm not superstitious. I'm not afraid to fly. But on the off-hand chance this dream turns prophetic, I feel qualified enough to make a request for anyone unfortunate enough to be on that plane with me... I don't mind the idea of dying in a plane crash. In my dreams, I've done it a thousand times under a thousand different conditions. In most instances, death is instantaneous and painless. The thing that does bother me is what happens during that final plummet. Yes it's terrifying. But please, for the love of God, what's with the screaming? I understand you're frightened. I understand you don't want to die. I'm coming to terms with that myself as is every other passenger on that plane. But while I'm facing my imminent demise looking out the window in absolute silence and stunned horror, you're ruining the last few moments of everyone else's existence with your incessant shrill chimpanzee-like shrieking. You're going to die. Of what possible use is a last-minute vocal exercise going to serve other than to completely annoy everyone around you and make a terrible situation even more unbearable? We are all in shock. Our sense of time slows and our senses become sharper. Now is not the time to be yelling. I'm not a religious man; but I don't mind if you pray. I might even hold your hand. But please keep it within an acceptable decibel level. If your God is real, he isn't hard of hearing, and he's most certainly aware that the plane is going down. He apparently has a plan, and he's not going to change his mind on the basis of how loud you beg him to alter it. Besides, you have an eternal life to look forward to. Look at me... I'm an atheist, and I'm keeping my mouth shut. Superman doesn't exist, so I'm hoping you're not calling for him. Anyone who can help you is already busy trying. All I'm asking for a bit of reverence so we may die in dignity. If you treat it like a fucking roller coaster, I swear I'm going to punch you square in the kisser for depriving me of this... and I'm pretty sure I'll get away with it. bestof

THE BEST OF CRAIGSLIST "I have 2 dogs & I was buying a large bag of Pal at Big W and standing inline at the check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog. On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Pal Diet again although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Pal nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again. I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her. Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned. I told her no; it was because I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me. I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard as he staggered out the door. Stupid b*tch...why else would I buy dog food?? "

Written by an early feminist highlighting the differences between rape trials and other criminal cases, she asked her readers to imagine a robbery victim being questioned as rape victims are on the stand: Counsel: Mr. Smith, you were held up at gun-point at the corner of First and Main? Victim: Yes Counsel: Did you struggle with the robber? Victim: No. Counsel: Why not? Victim: He was armed. Counsel: Then you made a conscious decision to comply with his demands rather than resist? Victim: Yes. Counsel: Did you scream? Cry out? Victim: No, I was afraid. Counsel: I see. Have you ever been held up before? Victim: No. Counsel: Have you ever given money away? Victim: Yes, of course. Counsel: And you did so willingly? Victim: What are you getting at? Counsel: Well, let's put it like this, Mr. Smith. You've given money away in the past. In fact, you've got quite a reputation for philanthropy. How can we be sure that you weren't contriving to have your money taken from you by force? Counsel continues, questioning Mr. Smith about what he wore, where he walked, and when Counsel: In other words, Mr. Smith, you were walking around the streets late at night in a suit that practically advertised the fact that you might be a good target for easy money, isn't that so? I mean, if we didn't know better, Mr. Smith, we might even think you were asking for this to happen, mightn't we? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - copied from Rachel's Blog. ^_^

"Any kind of honesty is rebellion" -Yevgeny Yevtushenko part 1. I made a mistake that time. I put into my head enough thoughts for both of us. the unknown is what I need what you think. literally. Like a jar that will not open no matter how many men you ask and how much pride you give up. take it back to when he sat next to her and listened for moments of disaster but all she could think was "he's sitting across from me and we are not in class!" We are agreeing. we sit. not worrying of time. but now, time is disasterous. avoiding each other at every step, every instance. When did i become the kind to feed the fire to beat the dead horse I must think he'll wake up. When we put ourselves in a room with the door closed, blinds closed, not more than a foot apart. Our chairs rolled, swiveled, back and forth. Her wanting to move closer to him found the only time he did not back away. But she knew she would ruin everything if that room had become a confessional booth. But I made a mistake that time. I put you above me. And without balance without equality we slowly pushed each other away. He didnt want to feel while she didnt want not to why can't honesty prevail when disaster is sought out and created by each side. But i digress... I made a mistake that time. and what is done cannot be undone. ``` part 2. But look at me, I cannot even stop thinking about you let alone writing about you or wanting something out of this. This, this, is nothing. You should mean nothing. But alone i sit, thinking about how you're doing, how you're feeling because of this, this, feeling. never will this be what it feels like. never will i feel what it really is. why never can i understand you as you The muse gives away all her ideas and cant keep any for herself. other people inspire me but i dont inspire myself. i think you are beautiful and not of myself. or at least not as much. a curse i think. nothing more. part 3. swimming swimming slowly slown sorry im sorry sex signifies solitude amongst society situated stiffly singing of sullen but sweet fragility solo sentences see satisfaction your signature simply symbolizes buddhist shrines saturday sought out school stems south in interest strange to see your sights on strike I must subject silly shots swung to share a split second stung sorrow spent well silly me, safety first. sexual situations like sulfur straight sunny superior suffocating support severe serenading to the source of serious self-denial sacrifice surrender the sublime.

so, at this college there was an extra credit question: "Is hell endothermic or exothermic"? This is what one kid wrote: " First, we postulate that if souls exist, then they must have some mass. If they do, then a mole of souls can also have a mass. So, at what rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for souls entering hell, lets look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to hell. Since, there are more than one of these religions and people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change in volume in hell. Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in hell to stay the same, the ratio of the mass of souls and volume needs to stay constant. So, if hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter hell, then the temperature and pressure in hell will increase until all hell breaks loose (i.e.,Hell is exothermic). Of course, if hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in hell, than the temperature and pressure will drop until hell freezes over (i.e.,Hell is endothermic). So which is it? If we accept the postulate given by Ms.Therese Banyan during my freshman year, "That it will be a cold night in hell before I go out with you," and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having a relationship with her, the second case cannot be true. Therefore, hell is exothermic." The kid was the only one who got credit

Advice to Young Men Date: 2007-02-15, 9:08AM PST Advice to Young Men 1. Don’t pick on the weak. It’s immoral. Don’t antagonize the strong without cause, its stupid. 2. Don’t hate women. It’s a waste of time 3. Invest in yourself. Material things come to those that have self actualized. 4. Get in a fistfight, even if you are going to lose. 5. Don’t join the military, unless you want to risk getting your balls blown off to secure other people’s economic or political interests. 6. If something has a direct benefit to an individual or a class of people, and a theoretical, abstract, or amorphous benefit to everybody else, realize that the proponent’s intentions are to benefit the former, not the latter, no matter what bullshit they try to feed you. 7. Don’t be a Republican. They are self-dealing crooks with no sense of honor or patriotism to their fellow citizens. If you must be a Republican, don’t be a “conservative.” They are whining, bitching, complaining, simple-minded self-righteous idiots who think they’re perpetual victims. Listen to talk radio for a while, you’ll see what I mean. 8. Don’t take proffered advice without a critical analysis. 90% of all advice is intended to benefit the proponent, not the recipient. Actually, the number is probably closer to 97%, but I don’t want to come off as cynical. 9. You’ll spend your entire life listening to people tell you how much you owe them. You don’t owe the vast majority of people shit. 10. Don’t undermine your fellow young men. Mentor the young men that come after you. Society recognizes that you have the potential to be the most power force in society. It scares them. Society does not find young men sympathetic. They are afraid of you, both individually and collectively. Law enforcement’s primary purpose is to suppress you. 11. As a young man, you’re on your own. Society divides and conquers. Unlike women who have advocates looking out for them (NOW, Women’s Study Departments, government, non-profit organizations, political advocacy groups) almost no one is looking out for you. 12. Young men provide the genius and muscle by which our society thrives. Look at the Silicone Valley. By in large, it was not old men or women that created the revolution we live. Realize that society steals your contributions, secures it with our intellectual property laws, and then takes credit and the rewards where none is due. 13. Know that few people have your best interests at heart. Your mother does. Your father probably does (if he stuck around). Your siblings are on your side. Everybody else worries about themselves. 14. Don’t be afraid to tell people to “Fuck off” when need be. It is an important skill to acquire. As they say, speak your piece, even if your voice shakes. 15. Acquire empathy, good interpersonal skills, and confidence. Learn to read body language and non-verbal communication. Don’t just concentrate on your vocational or technical skills, or you’ll find your wife fucking somebody else. 16. Keep fit. 17. Don’t speak ill of your wife/girlfriend. Back her up against the world, even if she’s wrong. She should know that you have her back. When she needs your help, give it. She should know that you’ll take her part. 18. Don’t cheat on your wife/girlfriend. If you must cheat, don’t humiliate her. Don’t risk having your transgressions come back to her or her friends. Don’t do it where you live. Don’t do it with people in your social circle. Don’t shit in your own back yard. 19. If your girlfriend doesn’t make you feel good about yourself and bring joy to your life, fire her. That’s what girlfriends are for. 20. Don’t bother with “emotional affairs.” They are just a vehicle for women to flirt and have someone make them feel good about themselves. That’s the part of a relationship they want. For you it is a lot of work and investment in time. If they are having an emotional affair with you, they’re probably fucking someone else. 21. Becoming a woman’s friend and confidant is not going to get you into an intimate relationship. If you haven’t gotten the girl within a reasonably short period of time, chances are you won’t ever get her. She’ll end up confiding to you about the sexual adventures she’s having with someone else. 22. Have and nurture friendships with women. 23. Realize that love is a numbers game. Guys fall in love easily. You’re going to see some girl and feel like you’ll die if you don’t get her. If she rejects you, move on to the next one. It’s her loss. 24. Don’t be an internet troll. Got out and live life. There is not a cadre of beautiful women advertising on Craigslist to have NSA sex with you. Beautiful women don’t need to advertise. The websites that advertise with attractive women’s photos and claims of loneliness are baloney. All they want is your money and your personal information so that they can market to you. The posts on Craigslist by young “women” seeking NSA sex, and asking for a picture are just a bunch of gay troll pic collectors. This is especially true if the post uses common gay lexicon like “hole” as in “fuck my hole” or seeks “masculine” men, or uses the word cock (except in the context of “Don’t send a cock shot.”) There are women on Craigslist. They are easily recognizable by their 2-5 paragraph postings. Most are in their 30's or older. 25. When you become a man in full, know that people will get in your way. People who are attracted to you will somehow manage to step in your path. Gay guys will give you “the look.” Old people will somehow stumble in front of you at the worst time. Don’t get frustrated. Just step aside and go about your business. Know that these are passive aggressive methods to get you to acknowledge their existence. 26. Don’t gay bash. Don’t mentally or physically abuse people because of who they are, or how they present themselves. It’s none of your business to try to intimidate people into conformity. 27. If your gay, admit it to yourself, your parents, your friends and society at large. Be prepared to get harassed. See rule 14. If someone threatens you or assaults you, call the cops. Have them arrested. You have no obligation to self sacrifice because of who you are. As a gay person, you’ll have more social freedom than straight men. Use it to protect yourself. Be prepared to get out of Dodge if your orientation makes your life unbearable. Move to San Francisco, New York, Atlanta, or New Orleans. You’ll find a welcoming community there. 28. Don’t be a poser. Avoid being one of those dudes who puts a surfboard on top of their car, but never surfs, or a dude with a powder coated fixed gear bike and a messenger bag, but was never a messenger. Live the life. Earn your bona fides. 29. Don’t believe the crap about the patriarchy. More women are accepted and attend college. More degrees are awarded to women than men. Women outlive men. More men commit suicide. Men are twice as likely to be victims of violence, including murder. If you consider sexual assaults in prisons, twice as many men are raped as women (society thinks prison rape is funny). The streets are littered with homeless men, sprinkled with a few homeless women. Statically, women are happier than men. The myth that girls are being cheated by are educational system is belied by the fact that schools are bastions of femininity, mostly run by and taught by women. Girls outperform boys in school. It is the boys in school getting fucked over, and prescribed ritalin for being boys. Real wages for men are falling, while real wages for women are rising. Just because someone says something enough times, doesn’t make it true. You have nothing to feel guilty about. 30. Remember, 97% of all advice is worthless. Take what you can use, and trash the rest.

Bullets and cuts couldnt hurt me like you you ravage and visibly cut down every image i have pasted up on this wall. the wall between myself and myself. yes i said myself and MYSELF. the me thats like HEY you are perfect for me, evey litle thing we have in common imtelling you you are amazing. but you knwo your not. my ego builder satisfuies for the moment. until you spit me away like a watermelon seed well drained of flavor. myself and myself. the wall between both is crashing down. and u saw it coming 400 yards away. the other me who says damn you are not someone i would ever watse my time on. you are not as intelligent as i thought you do not have very good ideas i actually DO not agree with you on that. myself and myself. razors, papercuts, shanks, scalpels, knives, machetes, 12 gauge rifles, blowtorches, and a fucking cannon could not hurt me like you do. and this is not, i repeat, this is not, a love hate poem. you knwo the kind whining of how much some asshole tore out my heart and spit on it. no this is realistic. a cannon could blow a hole straight thru to the other side and take my breath from my body. but you, conniving, social parasite you are, cannot take my breath. only can my mind play tricks on my body and seem to draw strings from my chest as if, pulling the life out of me, string by string, by s t r i n g. so realistically , this is not a love hate poem. this is my way or the highway you said. or so i think. enlighten me.. im one step behind. B.Young.copyright.2007 Currently reading : Cause of Death : A Writer's Guide to Death, Murder and Forensic Medicine (Howdunit Series) By Keith D. Wilson Release date: By September, 1992

Pitchfork.com says about Tom Waits single, "Road To Peace" -

"...It's also quite the political scamp, going on for a good seven minutes about the Israeli-Palestinian conflict and questioning the ethics of the sitting U.S. president. At times it sounds like Waits is reading straight off the CNN ticker, but we forgive him, because these are vital topics that ought to be on folks' minds."

If you havent heard this song. go Here to listen to it NOW.

Road to Peace
by Tom Waits (off the new Brawlers album)

Young Abdel Mahdi (Shahmay) was only 18 years old,
He was the youngest of nine children, never spent a night away from home.
And his mother held his photograph, opening the New York Times
To see the killing has intensified along the road to peace

There was a tall, thin boy with a whispy moustache disguised as an orthodox Jew
On a crowded bus in Jerusalem, some had survived World War Two
And the thunderous explosion blew out windows 200 yards away
With more retribution and seventeen dead along the road to peace

Now at King George Ave and Jaffa Road passengers boarded bus 14a
In the aisle next to the driver Abdel Mahdi (Shahmay)
And the last thing that he said on earth is "God is great and God is good"
And he blew them all to kingdom come upon the road to peace

Now in response to this another kiss of death was visited upon
Yasser Taha, Israel says is an Hamas senior militant
And Israel sent four choppers in, flames engulfed, tears wide open
And it killed his wife and his three year old child leaving only blackened skeletons

It's found his toddlers bottle and a pair of small shoes and they waved them in front of the cameras
But Israel says they did not know that his wife and child were in the car
There are roadblocks everywhere and only suffering on TV
Neither side will ever give up their smallest right along the road to peace

Israel launched it's latest campaign against Hamas on Tuesday
Two days later Hamas shot back and killed five Israeli soldiers
So thousands dead and wounded on both sides most of them middle eastern civilians
They fill the children full of hate to fight an old man's war and die upon the road to peace

"And this is our land we will fight with all our force" say the Palastinians and the Jews
Each side will cut off the hand of anyone who tries to stop the resistance
If the right eye offends thee then you must pluck it out
And Mahmoud Abbas said Sharon had been lost out along the road to peace

Once Kissinger said "we have no friends, America only has interests"
Now our president wants to be seen as a hero and he's hungry for re-election
But Bush is reluctant to risk his future in the fear of his political failures
So he plays chess at his desk and poses for the press 10,000 miles from the road to peace

In the video that they found at the home of Abdel Mahdi (Shahmay)
He held a Kalashnikov rifle and he spoke with a voice like a boy
He was an excellent student, he studied so hard, it was as if he had a future
He told his mother that he had a test that day out along the road to peace

The fundamentalist killing on both sides is standing in the path of peace
But tell me why are we arming the Israeli army with guns and tanks and bullets?
And if God is great and God is good why can't he change the hearts of men?
Well maybe God himself is lost and needs help
Maybe God himself he needs all of our help
Maybe God himself is lost and needs help
He's out upon the road to peace

Well maybe God himself is lost and needs help
Maybe God himself he needs all of our help
And he's lost upon the road to peace
And he's lost upon the road to peace
Out upon the road to peace.

A Response to a Boy's Blog I really care about: when something in your gut does not react the same as usual, u know its time for change. the only thing u can do is let it happen and not hold back, even though so many fear to do so. so many get in the habit of finding a path they find suits them perfectly, but end up questioning it later on and self consciously have too much pride within to go back, to tell themselves they made a mistake or rather have changed in ideals, morals, what-have-you. i think when your not getting the answers you need, you're looking to hard. even looking to hard for something that will not be attained. something your mind wants to happen but realistically wont. people do understand each other on some level and to some extent, but in the end, when there is no one who understands, its best to know that you are the only person who can understand yourself. put trust where it's needed, in yourself. you are always the one who knows yourself best, so, follow your heart. what do you want from other people? to tell you you dont know shit. to say you need to get over it to say i understand where your coming from and have the exact same problem it wouldnt help. no one has the answer, your answer, to your problem. so of course they're not gona say what they think to your face, because they'll be wrong and they know it. they're opinion does not matter. you are the master of your destiny. a man's character is his destiny. you have the force. you just have to accept change and go with it. now why cant i take my own advice?